While I appreciate your dedication and perseverance this year, I am ready for you to leave town and take your annual vacation. I think someone may have played an April Fool's joke on you and moved your calendar back to January... because it appears that you don't know that IT IS APRIL. You know what April brings, Winter? TRACK AND FIELD.
Because of you, we have had countless meets cancelled already. We have had miserable practices in your ice-cold grasp. We are ready to compete, and you're really messing that up.
I know you're just trying to be a good friend and stick around longer than normal, but I think it's time for you to move on. It's time for your cousin Spring to come to town, but you're hogging the air. Go back to the North Pole and come back in December.
Runners of Iowa